u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
