can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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