Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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