you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
