This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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