I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Randomize