How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
