I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
