That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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