A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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