normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
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