The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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