remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
