and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
