dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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