So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
