Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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