Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize