I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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