I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
