please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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