So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
