i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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