Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
