he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
