when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
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