Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
