Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
