i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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