So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
