his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
