I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
My butt remains clenched, sir.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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