Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
