you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Randomize
