I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You're like the curious george of whores
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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