It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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