then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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