I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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