I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
