its not stalking. its research.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
