I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
