She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
