Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
