You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
There r osticjed everywhere
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
