wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
