Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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