look no pants
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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