Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
