I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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