You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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