Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Randomize
