i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
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